If you think hearts are only for love letters, think again!
This post is packed with funny heart puns that will make you chuckle, groan, and maybe even roll your eyes in the best way possible. Whether you’re a pun lover, a dad-joke enthusiast, or just looking for clean, clever humor, these heart puns are your perfect dose of laughter.
Get ready to explore witty plays on the word “heart” that work for Instagram captions, jokes for kids, or just a good old-fashioned pun session. From short quips to clever one-liners, each joke is designed to make your day brighter and your heart lighter. Dive in, and see how a little humor can warm up your heart in ways you didn’t expect.
Heart Jokes That Will Make You LOL ❤️
- I tried to find a good heart joke, but it was aorta lot harder than I thought.
- My heart said yes, but my wallet said no.
- You stole a pizza my heart — extra cheese, please.
- I’m reading a book about the heart — it’s a real page-turner.
- Broken heart? Call a cardiologist, or just eat chocolate.
- I’m totally atrium about you.
- My heart is on autopilot… straight to laughter.
- Don’t go breaking my heart, or I’ll send it back.
- My heart skipped a beat — or maybe I just tripped.
- Cupid called, he said my aim’s pun-tastic.
- I have a heart of gold… and a pun dictionary.
- Want to steal my heart? Bring snacks.
Cute Heart Puns for Kids ❤️

- My heart says playtime, not homework.
- You make my heart jump like a frog.
- I’m not lion, you’re purr-fect for my heart.
- Hearts are like balloons — mine floats toward you.
- My heart is a cookie, and you’re the chocolate chips.
- I’d share my ice cream, that’s how much I care.
- My heart’s in a happy dance!
- Hearts beat faster for fun, not chores.
- I drew a heart for you — it’s finger-paint approved.
- My heart says hug, my feet say run.
- You’ve got the key to my heart-shaped box.
- My heart’s a sandwich — you’re the extra cheese.
Clever Heart Puns for Instagram ❤️
- Heart eyes aren’t optional.
- Beating hearts, not deadlines.
- Love in pixels, laughter in hearts.
- My heart likes your vibe.
- Heart it, don’t just double-tap.
- Keep calm and follow your heart.
- Heartfelt moments, photo-ready.
- Laugh first, love second, heart always.
- My heart’s on fleek today.
- Puns over everything, heart included.
- Heart strings attached — handle with care.
- Smile, your heart’s watching.
Dad-Approved Heart Puns ❤️

- I asked my heart to do some work — it said no.
- Why did the heart go to school? To get a little circulation.
- My heart loves bad jokes — call it cardio humor.
- I told my heart a pun, now it’s beating faster.
- You can’t arrest a heart — it’s always on the run.
- Why did the heart cross the road? To pump some traffic.
- My heart said exercise, my couch disagreed.
- Hearts run marathons; I run to the fridge.
- My heart skipped class today — too much excitement.
- Love is in the air, but my heart prefers Wi-Fi.
- My heart is punctual… except when it skips.
- Beat it? Only if it’s a drumline.
Short and Sweet Heart Puns ❤️
- Heart you forever.
- Aorta lot of love.
- Love you a latte.
- Be my heart-throb.
- Heart attack of laughter.
- Full of heart, short on patience.
- Heart to heart, pun to pun.
- Heartfelt giggles ahead.
- You’ve got a heart mark.
- Love beats logic.
- Heart vibes only.
- Pumped with joy.
Clean Heart Jokes for All Ages ❤️

- My heart prefers hugs to high fives.
- Laughter is the best medicine for a broken heart.
- A heart without humor is just an organ.
- Pump up the fun, not your stress.
- Hearts are heavy when jokes are missing.
- Tick-tock goes the heart clock, pun o’clock!
- Keep your heart light and your jokes lighter.
- I gave my heart a day off — it needed a laugh.
- No heart was harmed while writing these puns.
- Smile — it’s cardio-friendly.
- Laugh more, stress less, love lots.
- Heart jokes: approved for all ages.
Heart Puns for Valentine’s Day ❤️
- You have my heart on speed dial.
- Be mine, or at least share chocolate.
- My heart goes boom when you’re near.
- Cupid called — he wants a raise.
- You + me = heart emoji overload.
- Falling for you was un-aorta-dinary.
- Roses are red, puns are funny, hearts are mine if you share honey.
- Heartbeat racing, pun chasing.
- My heart is yours… but I’ll keep the snacks.
- You stole my heart — and it’s still on layaway.
- Be my pun-valentine?
- Heartfelt wishes sent your way.
Heart Puns for Social Media Captions ❤️

- Keep calm and love your heart.
- Heart vibes on point today.
- Love out loud, laugh louder.
- Heart-shaped moments captured here.
- Puns + hearts = Instagram magic.
- Swipe right for a laugh, left for chocolate.
- Heart it or regret it.
- Feeling heart-full today.
- Caption this with a heart emoji.
- Laugh, love, and leave a heart.
- Hearts over hashtags.
- Emoji your heart out.
Conclusion ❤️
These heart puns are proof that laughter truly warms the heart.
Pick your favorites, share them with friends, and let your heart smile every day.
Funny, clever, and clean, these heart puns are perfect for any mood or moment.